How to Avoid Writing

Examine writing space. Decide that it's too shabby and rundown to be conducive to good creative flow. Think about redecorating.

Go to paint store. Buy paint for writing space, and as long as you're there for the upstairs bathroom, the hallway, the dining room and the back door to the house.

Realize that it's too humid to paint. Nothing will dry. Store paint in cellar.

Boot computer.

Read email.

Do Facebook.

Play four rounds of Shoo Boo.

Realize that Turner Classic Movies is having a John Gilbert festival. You love John Gilbert. Those eyes. that hair.

Watch three John Gilbert movies.

Turn off television. Make dinner. Eat dinner. Wash dishes.

Boot computer. Realize that it's too hot to be conducive to good creative flow.

Play two more rounds of Shoo Boo.

Realize you're too sleepy to play Shoo Boo.

Brush teeth. Take pill. Resolve to write something tomorrow, or if it's not so humid, to paint something.

Turn in.

Kate Gallison